Our discussion of The Sibling Effect

We met last night to discuss The Sibling Effect by Jeffrey Kluger.   We found we had a lot to talk about, so I will try to hit some of the highlights here:

• One reader started out by saying that she felt the book was "A thinly veiled attempted at writing his autobiography."   She felt the author could have just written about his own family, and his own experiences.   Her reaction seemed to echo a sentiment from the New York Times review of the book, which included this sentence: "But did you share my sense that Kluger mostly cares about the confessional material, and that the scientific stuff is wrapped around it to turn a wound into a book?"
• However, other readers had a different reaction.  One person said they felt that his life stories kept the book going and broke it up so that the book wasn't just about facts and statistics.  Another reader said he liked how each chapter was different, and that the research was interesting to learn about.
• We had some general discussion about the research and statistics.   One person said that to them, it seemed a lot of "what" and not a lot of "why."    Another reader, who was familiar with some of this research, said that the conclusions she had come to long ago with her own thesis seemed validated by the research Kluger included in the book.  She liked that he included not only references to his own family, but that he included other examples, like that of the Kennedy family.   To her, these examples made the research not only more interesting, but clearer, as well.   Readers also mentioned that they liked how Kluger included examples from different ethnic groups and cultures.
• We also had some discussion about nature versus nuture, and how although the research cited in the book does show trends, that there are always exceptions.   One person said he had approached the book with some skepticism, but once he read it, felt that he could see that there are patterns that emerge from the research, but that there are always variations.   He felt the author was pretty fair-minded and even-handed in the book, which other readers felt, as well.
• We talked about some of what Kluger wrote about birth-order, and how it seemed like we could find examples from our own experiences of where it seemed true, and also found exceptions.  One reader said she felt it seemed like the author was very confident about the whole first-born role.   We talked about the concept of how first-born children might have more opportunities or resources, but one reader said she has several friends who have mentioned that the last-born children seem to have it better (because the parents are more worn down by that point).
• Readers felt that Kluger's own family experiences were interesting to read about.  We talked about the resilience of all four brothers, and how difficult it must have been for them.   However, we all agreed that there was never a tone of "Poor me" coming through in this book (which we appreciated).

We always welcome more discussion, so if you have read this book, please feel free to leave a comment!